I'd like to begin with one simple statement:
You're not alone.
Have you ever felt like you are just stuck in life? Stuck in the same job you hate? Stuck in unemployment? Or just lost in the sauce? Again, you are not alone!! Following my first stint in graduate school, I was in the biggest rut ever. Imagine, having an education but nowhere to showcase your knowledge/talents. OR....imagine having countless goals and no sense of direction. It seemed like I was on a rollercoaster of endless job rejections and obstacles; until one day I realized that my self-doubt was crippling any semblance of progress in my life. Despite all of my other successes, I didn't believe in myself and my self-confidence was shattered; I had become my worst hater.
After years of working on myself, I thought I had addressed all my self-doubt issues until I started this blog and realized how many other more successful bloggers there were within this community. Everyday I discovered hundreds of other bloggers and there my self-doubt was again, rearing its ugly head. Long story short, it's time to nip this in the bud before I turn 30 and I'm singing the same "Woe is me/I can't do it" song. Last week, I had the pleasure of speaking with some of my former students and I saw myself in them. They were full of hopes and dreams. Many of them were just beginning their journeys but were already discouraged because they had no idea where to start. So here are a few tips I gave them, that have helped me along the way (and are still helping me today):
Write all of your goals down and look at them constantly. A huge mistake I made in the past was writing a goal in some notebook that sat at the bottom of a backpack somewhere in the back of my closet. What a waste! Now, I have several dry erase boards in my apartment, with goals, or quotes that help to keep my priorities in order. Start by listing your pritiorites from the most important (and in need of immediate attention) to the least important. To get you going, here are some great questions to think about when determining what your next step is:
What is your ultimate goal? Become a high school teacher? Be a Grammy award winning artist? Start your own business? Make sure you reach for the stars...but also make sure your goal is realistic.
What is the first step you need to take to get to that goal? Research the requirements for the position you may want in your local town. Or maybe you need to find out what tax forms you may need to fill out for your new business. Whatever you do, don't get overwhelmed by the amount of information you may find; remember this is only the first step.
Have you obtained the appropriate classes, certifications or test scores for the goal in questions? If not....what are you waiting on?? Again, research the requirements! Do you need a vocal coach to tune your voice...go get it sis (or bro)!
Do you need to make a monetary investment or fulfill any financial obligations associated with your goal? I hate buying things that I know I need to achieve whatever goal I have but like my mother says..."There's no better investment that an investment in yourself."
2. Realize that NO ONE can take away what is meant for you.
The title of this post says it all, manifest YOUR destiny! I hear so many testimonies of individuals who have experienced defeat at the hands of some John Doe, who condemned them to a life of failure. First of all, absolutely no one is all knowing. Don't let anyone project their negativity onto you! We give way too much power to the Negative Nancys trying to snuff the light of anyone with a future brighter than theirs. Repeat after me: "Back the H-E-double hockey sticks up hater!! You're dismissed!"
3. Get out of your own head.
It wasn't until I started believing in myself, and sometimes just pretending like I did, that things started coming to fruition. At my lowest, I decided that I would just take the bull by the horns...and I ended up with a CAREER... let me repeat that... a CAREER, (not a just a regular ol' job) that I wasn't even looking for. One RANDOM opportunity set the trajectory for what is now my passion; teaching. It may not happen overnight, but it will happen.. and until then fake it til' you make it. You may run into several roadblocks along the way, but believing in yourself will get easier and easier, I promise.
4. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
Sometimes you have to get out of your shell and reach out for help. If someone is unwilling to help you, move on to the next person. The most important thing is that you find someone who has expertise in whatever you are trying to achieve. Contrary to popular belief, it's not always what you know; it's who you know.
Finally, just create your own lane. Others may be doing something similar to you (they're not you so your "competition" will never be doing the SAME thing), but that shouldn't stop you. Take it one step at a time and accomplish your goals!!
What do you do to manifest your destiny?!