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Open Letter: To All The Kings Who Weren't Ready For a Queen

November 5, 2017










Before beginning this letter, I’d like to release a friendly disclaimer:

By no means is this letter a representation of how I feel about the entire male species. This platform also isn’t being used as a venue for the opening speech of the ‘I Hate All Men Convention.” However, over the years I have been holding onto things that need to be released. Why now? ‘Cause it’s about time someone said it!


Before you say it, women are not without fault. I know that some of you may have your own grievances for us queens, but this isn’t the forum for that [at least not today].… Again, if you don’t care to read this post, you should stop reading now and transition to another one of my blog posts (shameless plug). For the rest of you still here, please read this with an open mind.










Dear King,


First things first, you are appreciated. Without a man falling in love and going half on a baby with my mother, I wouldn’t be pouring my deepest thoughts to you in this letter; So thanks! Ok, now let’s get to the nitty gritty. In this letter (given to you from a queen's perspective), I decided to refer to you as "Kings." I'm not speaking for all women, but personally, I think I hit the nail on the head on identifying a King who just isn't ready for a queen. Unfortunately,  some of you aren't ready to embrace the colloquialism, but hopefully someday you will be:


King: “I don’t want a girl, but we can chill and do other stuff.”

You are the undefeated champion for stringing women along. If no one has told you before, it's sickening and actually does more harm than good. For years I’ve been led to believe that being “wifey material” is some sort of consolation prize. Some of the guys I fancied, gave me false hope that if I was patient enough, they would come around. Fortunately, I was never actually “wifed,” or courted by those sons of queens; go figure. Just be honest and let us know if you’re just not that interested; in the long run, it will hurt less.


King: “I have a girl, but I want you too.”

In the words of SZA, “Why you bother me when you know you got a woman?!” If you are over the age of 20 and still pulling this stunt, it’s time to do better. Let's be clear, I'm not a supporter of infidelity, but if you wouldn't want to be my side piece then why would you expect me to want to be yours? I don’t like sloppy seconds and I don’t like to share. I don’t want you on the weekends, and at this point I don’t even want you during the week. It’s time to have more respect for yourself and the women you deal with.



Let's stop knowingly slipping into the role of the side chick and then being mad we’re not his main chick.

This type of king is never going to give you that title sis.”



Queen: "It’s not me, it’s you.”

Thank you for finally blessing me with your ungraceful, yet timely, exit. I made the mistake of thinking I was the problem, when all along it was you. I’m sure that you’ll be great for whomever you end up with down the road, but your existence in my life was unhealthy and just plain ol’ toxic. I was completely oblivious to the games you were playing, took everything you told me for face value, and continued to downplay my worth so I could be more appealing to you. I wasn’t worth your time and now I realize you weren’t worth a millisecond of mine. On a lighter-note, I wish you nothing but success, happiness, and love. And with that I bid you adieu.



"Hear ye! Hear ye!"

Your queen is out there waiting for you. If you are a king, ready to crown your queen; take that leap of faith and make it happen! You’ll never complete your kingdom if you keep sitting on the sidelines. As for the kings who refuse to step into their role....I'll pray for you.




Tha Girl Upstairs


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